Beyond the stories #5 With Dr Anna Huang

When Mom Goes Out — Parenting Guilt, Big Feelings, and Raising Emotionally Aware Kids

What happens to a family's emotional world when mom isn't there? And why does leaving — even for an hour — trigger such a loud alarm in so many parents?

In this episode of Beyond the Stories, Rita sits down with Dr. Anna Huang — licensed therapist, Chinese-American mom, and founder of The Mindful Peach — to explore the emotional landscape of modern parenting, from the science of parental guilt to the books she wrote because the ones she needed simply didn't exist.

Dr. Anna brings both clinical expertise and her own lived experience as a new mom to a conversation that is honest, grounding, and full of warmth.

What you'll hear in this episode:
— Why parental guilt is a biological alarm — not a sign you're doing it wrong
— The "24/7 available parent" myth and why it's harming families
— How dads can build their own irreplaceable bond with their kids
— Why children need parents to have their own special roles — not identical ones
— How The Mindful Peach came to life — and the gap in children's literature it was built to fill
— What the Eden's Big Feelings bilingual book series is, and who it's for
— Why emotional literacy in toddlers starts with colorful, joyful books — not definitions

This episode pairs beautifully with the story episode featuring "When Mom Goes Out." Listen to both — the conversation and the story work together.

Dr. Anna Huang is a licensed therapist in private practice and the founder of The Mindful Peach, a family wellness brand dedicated to helping families become more emotionally aware. She is the author of the Eden's Big Feelings bilingual children's book series — covering the six primary emotions for toddlers ages 2–6, available in English, Chinese, Korean, Spanish, and more. She lives with her husband and daughter and launched The Mindful Peach two years ago.

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📍 Instagram: @themindfulpeach.co
🌐 Website: https://www.mindfulpeach.co/
📚 Books: Available at themindfulpeach.co and Amazon

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:03

Hello everyone, welcome back to Beyond the Stories. I'm Rita. If you've just listened to today's Once Upon a Feeling story, this episode is where we slow things down and unpack together with an expert. These conversations are here to support parents, caregivers, and educators, to explore the emotional themes beneath the story, what children might be picking up on developmentally and relationally, and how storytelling can become a tool for connection rather than correction. I'm so glad you're here, and let's get into it. Hi everyone, welcome to this week's Beyond the Story. This week we read When Mom Goes Out. Here's the But and a Story about sadness and separation anxiety. And today, I have the pleasure and the honor to have Dr. Anna on our podcast. She is not only a clinical psychologist practicing currently in Orange County, California, she is also the author and the co-founder of The Mindful Page, the publisher of the story that we just read. So stay tuned. I hope this particular interview lands and give you some actional steps that you can implement in your own home. Enjoy. Thank you, Dr. Yana, for joining me this week. And I'm so excited about this story. Uh, when mom goes out, I read it, my kids read it uh in his home. I have an 11 and nine-year-old, and I recently just left for a trip to AJAD to be with my mom for about 10 years. And I just found out that my nine-year-old apparently had hard feelings and cried while I was gone. And I she read the book. So very relevant. Before we dive into what you do and the stories that you're writing, I always like to start with a little bit of an origin story. How did you find out like this is what you want to do? How did little Anna figure out, like one day when I grow up, like I want to be a clinical psychologist?

SPEAKER_00 2:19

Yeah, happy to do that. Funny enough, I did not realize or land upon clinical psychology until like almost, I think, my junior year in college, when I felt like it was time to actually get official schooling for that. Because truly growing up, I just didn't really know psychology was a thing. Like it wasn't a subject offered in my high school. It was certainly not something my parents talked about, which is ironic because they both worked in universities and psychology is one of the most popular majors. But they're both like hard science, you know, like chemistry, molecules, that kind of science. Um, so I thought, you know, I would be a teacher, maybe I'd be a doctor, kind of the classic majors available for Asian Americans back then, at least with the Asians I grew up with. And it wasn't until I was in college being like, oh, I really am not enjoying any of these classes. I really can't picture myself doing these jobs. And, you know, bless my parents, they just hadn't helped me actually figure out what I really liked and what my actual talents were. They just kind of steered me toward these end goals. And so I did have a mentor at the time who helped me self-reflect a little more and think about what were the things I most enjoyed doing? And I vividly remember feeling so silly saying this because I was like, well, this isn't a real thing, but I just love listening to people tell stories. I was always the one in my friend group that people would tell their problems to or process things with. And I had my own family things going on. And so I was trying to process that with words. I would journal like every day. I have like dozens of books filled up. So it was a lot of trying to understand my own story and other people's stories. And the mentor was like, oh, there's a job for that. You could be a therapist, you could listen to people tell stories all day. So I did my research on it and pursued it. And that is how I ended up here. And so it, I really had to go back and educate my parents on what this job was and what it entailed, you know, that it was a real job. I could make a living from it. My dad was very concerned about that. And so I've kind of come full circle, I think of I get to listen to people all day, tell their stories and try to help them understand themselves. And I also never lost that part of me that wishes, you know, I had parents or caregivers who could help me know myself better earlier on. And so I try to do that for my clients and then trying to find other ways to do that for people at large.

SPEAKER_01 4:42

That is so interesting. Yeah, I'm first generation, so I grew up in Asia. And even to this day, like psychology or you know, seeking counseling, is this there is still some sort of like stigma against it. Totally, totally yeah. So what you brought up, it's I could totally relate because they don't talk about it. Like it's the They don't, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 5:06

I think some for some of them it feels like a pseudoscience, even like it's not a real thing, it's not a real job.

SPEAKER_01 5:11

Yeah, you know, especially now we're both mothers and being parents, and like, oh no, this is important. So important. Yeah. Now tell me a little bit about the mindful peach. How did that come to life? And what does that mean to you as a space, you know, in addition to your private practice?

SPEAKER_00 5:30

Yeah, yeah. So for those who don't know, a private practice for a therapist means just, you know, I have my own office, I see my own set of clients, and I can tend to do really long-term, kind of depth-oriented work. And so I'll see about the same, like my caseloads may be like 20 people. So I can see these same people for a long time, and I love getting to know them and hopefully impacting them for the better. But it's just those 20 people, too. And when I became a mom four years ago, I realized just the gap in the literature for books that talked about emotional issues that were also fun to read and like colorful and not like a dictionary, you know, definition of this is sadness. But books that my daughter would want to read that also had some Chinese. So I'm Chinese American and I wanted to be able to read it to her in both English and Chinese. And so using my psychology background and then my husband's very entrepreneur spirit, together we founded The Mindful Peach. And our goal is basically to just help families be more emotionally aware, um, which is pretty broad. And so the first project we started with is children's books. And so I wrote three books. There's our goal is to have six total in this series, which we're calling Eden's Big Feelings, where we're covering the six primary emotions. So it's like children's books, these ones are the target age, I would say, is toddlers. So maybe like two to maybe six. And then we also wanted them to be bilingual. So we have books where it's just the English text, but then also the English with various languages right on top of it. So Chinese, Korean, Spanish, etc. So that's currently where the brand is at in a nutshell. It's only been about two years since we started it.

SPEAKER_01 7:16

Congratulations. I feel like, you know, as far as my kids are concerned, they're still like they're still enjoying it and they're like nine and eleven board. Now let's kind of move into this specific one. It's interesting because separation anxiety, sure, there is the one where we I think we can all relate, you know, especially I remember it vividly when I had my first child, the very first time I left her. What's that was hard. It's so hard. So, from a child development standpoint, um, when you pull away, when you separate, actually happening there. Like we all have sort of an idea, but I have a feeling there are certain things that we're probably getting wrong. Can you speak a little bit to that? Just give us a little window into their brain and their, you know, what is developed, you know, what is developmentally appropriate, uh, what is happening.

SPEAKER_00 8:15

And the little girl is having a very big reaction to it. She's really sad, she's really anxious. And also, kind of the subtle uh other part of the story is you can tell she prefers mom. She would rather be with mom, but she's being left with dad. And dad having to handle that she's kind of bummed out the whole time mom is gone, doesn't really fully recover. And then, of course, mom comes back at the end. And I think one of the things that parents get wrong is is one, just kind of even what you were saying, Rita of like kids experience this separation anxiety for a long time. It's not just when they're newborns, you know, and like, oh, this adult doesn't smell like mom. Like, no, they can have this for a long, long time. And it's actually a sign of positive secure attachment. That when there's a separation, the attachment system gets activated. And so, in other words, it feels like a threat. Like the person who is my secure base, the person who I lean on for everything is about to leave. And especially if they're really young, they don't necessarily have even the brain space, the cognitive capacity to understand that like mom will come back. You know, they like my children, one and four, they still don't really have a concept of time. You could say five minutes, you can say 30 minutes. She doesn't really know what that means. And so telling her, like, I'll be back in 30 minutes, it still is just this like genuine threat that my favorite person is leaving me and feeling helpless, feeling scared. So I think a common misconception is actually that our children are like manipulating us, maybe to try to stay with like their tears or their tantrum, or even that they're just being really dramatic. But actually, the distress is very genuine. It's appropriate, you know, it would be threatening if you were a helpless child and your favorite caregiver is leaving. And typically, if you have a secure attachment with your child, they also can tolerate it. I don't know about you, but I know for me, when I'm first getting ready to like first started sending my child to daycare, they would throw the, you know, the most heart-wrenching tantrum. And the teacher would tell me two minutes after I was gone, they were fine. They'd moved on, they were playing, they were like, Yep, okay, I'm good now. So they're just telling me how upset they are that I'm leaving.

SPEAKER_01 10:29

Yeah, I remember that when during their preschool years were like even just watching other people dropping off their children, and then you know, you can see the mom and the dad just, oh no, we can't leave. They're crying so hard. Yeah, you know, I'll let you know. And yeah, usually as like within a few minutes, like after they're gone, they move on to, you know, the next thing.

SPEAKER_00 10:53

Yeah, they're okay. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 10:54

So I guess for all the parents out there who is navigating this right now, when they're separating, when they're navigating, like, what is the core message like they can give a child, you know, when they're walking away? Like, what is do you am I making any sense?

SPEAKER_00 11:11

Yes, yes. I remember one of the first week of lessons at my daughter's uh daycare when we first dropped her off. The like curriculum for that first week was your loved ones will always come back. And I think that's the core message. Like your loved one will return. And then the second part is, and you can tolerate how uncomfortable it is in between. That both the trust and the attachment figure, so typically mom, but dad, you know, grandma, whoever it might be, but also trusting in themselves, like I will survive this sadness or survive this anger. I can get through this hard thing. Yeah, they won't be able to put that into words, but kind of just the repeated felt experience of like, oh, that was so hard, and I got through it. And at least in this story, it's like they also have another parent figure, the father, helping tolerate with them, you know, that parents not being like, get over it, or like, oh my gosh, it's already been an hour. Like just this, you're having a hard time, and we're survive it together.

SPEAKER_01 12:12

So it's the validation and sitting with it.

SPEAKER_00 12:15

Yes, sitting with it.

SPEAKER_01 12:16

And as adults, we don't do that enough.

SPEAKER_00 12:18

We don't it is it's hard to be long-suffering.

SPEAKER_01 12:23

Now let's switch to the parent side because I know for me the guilt was it was loud when I decided to, you know, go out by myself for a meal or even just shopping without needing to lug the baby around. I think the guilt of leaving our children a lot of the time, it's its own kind of anxiety. Um can you from a clinical psychology standpoint? Like, why is that? Like, yeah, why do we feel so guilty to take care of ourselves?

SPEAKER_00 13:00

Yes, yes. I think first at the core, I think there's something biological, like going back to the idea of attachment. And for more, I would recommend any of these listeners, just Google attachment theory. It's a really helpful general theory and way to think about human relationships. But when our child, our own precious child, is distressed, our nervous system gets activated. There's something research has shown specifically about our child's cry or like that pitch of a cry. That's why hearing babies cry on an airplane where you're trapped, you're like, this is so uncomfortable. Like it's actually biologically activating our alarm, our stress. And so then we feel that guilt. We want to attune, we want to meet the need. I would say that's one part is that the guilt is a biological response. And I also think, especially in the Western world now and how society is currently set up, there's just this narrative that we're supposed to be available to our children 24/7. And we're not often raising our children in village, you know, the kind of it takes a village. Like it's typically like in our own family, there's one or two parents, and that's just impossible. And so I think we're battling that guilt of this completely unattainable thing of we're supposed to be these working parents or like totally present stay-at-home parents that our whole lives are our children. And I don't think that's healthy for the parent or the child.

SPEAKER_01 14:27

What would you say to the parent who who is struggling to take the time for themselves? Like, what is seven? Sometimes I feel like they need evidence and need permission, or they need to know that it's not only good for them for but also for their children as models. Like, what would you say to them to convince them to say, go take that three hours?

SPEAKER_00 14:47

Yeah, go walk. Yeah. I think you nailed you hit the nail on the head, which is it's good for the child. Like part of the reason we we try to keep meeting the needs, we don't want them to be stressed, distressed, is because we want the best for our child. So I would tell those parents, and typically it's moms, like, model for your child taking care of yourself. You know, you don't want your child growing up thinking like, well, this is what moms are supposed to do. They're just supposed to sacrifice their whole lives, especially if you have a daughter, right? You don't want her to grow up and do that. You want her to have a life still, even if she becomes a parent. And the research on burnout, I think, is so clear. Like, if you can't pour from this empty cup, if you're depleted, it doesn't make you a more present parent. It actually makes you a worse parent, frankly. And so taking care of yourself is a way to take care of your child.

SPEAKER_01 15:37

Yes. So all the parents out there, please take care of yourself first. This is something that's interesting that I have been seeing in my own household with my husband, and I would love your angle on this because you so you see way more than I do. And please do correct me if I'm wrong. But is there a gender disparity between mom and dad feeling the guilt? I feel like in my household, my husband just feels a lot more regulated when he goes out than I do. And sure, there's good, you know, a lot of it is probably personality. And I do spend more time with children. So usually when I leave, they have a bigger reaction. But what is what is out there? What is in the world and in your world, like what do you see? Is it does this show up differently between dads and moms, or you know, or maybe like the roles that they play in the house? And how do you navigate that, even just for your partner?

SPEAKER_00 16:36

Yeah, that is such a great point. And something I definitely see in my own marriage too. I do think there is a gender gap here. I have found both in my own marriage and in general, yes, women feel more guilt, they have a hard time leaving. And men just don't seem to experience that the same. And I think it goes back to that cultural narrative that the women are supposed to be totally available for the kids. You know, the men get to be the kind of moneymakers or doing things outside of the home. To give men credit, I think it's only in recent generations they've gotten more involved in the home. Um, and I think uh when I think of my husband, he has a different experience of a guilt of feeling powerless often because my children want me to do it. Like they prefer mom to do it. Even today we have this. Like, my daughter wants me to get her dressed, she wants me to make the breakfast, even things my husband is totally capable of doing, wants to do, is offering to do. Like if he does it, she might have a tantrum. So it's a different guilt of he wants to help, he wants to be present, and sometimes there's almost this rejection from the children that he has to cope with.

SPEAKER_01 18:00

So what do you do? Yeah, I think like in that situation, how do you advise them? How do you change that dynamic, or do you?

SPEAKER_00 18:07

I do think it's normal for children to have a parental preference. And I often think because women tend to be the ones that spend the most time with children when they're young, I mean, we're the ones who are literally growing them in our bodies and often nursing them. So it's normal they have a stronger bond with us in the beginning. So I would advocate for dads to really work on how it might trigger their own sense of self-esteem or insecurity that your child is not rejecting you. They just are drawn toward the parent that they spend more time with that feels safer because they're more familiar with them. And for the couple to set some boundaries. Like as we were preparing for our second to be born, we started taking turns with who was doing my child's bedtime. And my son is now one and a half, and my daughter still complains when it's her dad's turn. But we have that boundary of I know you'd prefer mom would do it. Dad's gonna do it tonight. I know you feel sad about that. Remember, you have the special things you do just with dad at bedtime. And just continuing to keep that boundary.

SPEAKER_01 19:18

Yeah, I think the boundary is some oftentimes it's hard too because the tantrums can be so triggering, right? And especially things like bedtime. I remember similar dynamics in my house, and my firstborn will literally cry for hours, screaming in the room. And I'm like, I can't. I am about to pop a second baby out. Yeah. At some point, you have to learn how to go to bed with daddy. And it was hard the first couple of weeks. You know, we just switching to that routine where daddy does bedtime and mommy has her the whole, you know, the whole day. She wouldn't have it. Uh, it was definitely difficult to navigate. But to set the boundary, I think that's that's so important.

SPEAKER_00 20:04

Yeah. And I think the key piece too is especially for the dads, tolerating the discomfort of your child not choosing you, you know, not wanting you, like now that my oldest is four, explicitly saying that, I don't want you, dad. And not taking it personally. This is a phase. It's normal for them to feel this way. It doesn't mean I'm a bad parent. I can tolerate it.

SPEAKER_01 20:33

What are some of the advice for the dads listening out there? Like certain things that they can do to move through it, other than just telling themselves, you know, I am not a bad dad. Like something that comes to my mind immediately. And I think it's gotten better. I mean, obviously nine and eleven, they don't say that anymore. But my husband is, you know, he's the bike guy, and he will take the kids out to do certain things. And it's actually really funny because my second born, I think what was it? I was like was a camping trip, school camping trip. And I said, Well, like, I will chap around you. And she literally said to me, I'm like, I think that's a job for daddy, not you. And so I think this is that that is kind of one of those things where yeah, it's you know, it's like they all now we're settled in into this little like there's something like when we're baking and cooking, it's it's it is so traditional, like totally falling into the bucket. But I'm here for the, you know, that's how I was raised. Sure. Yeah. You know, other family will probably look differently. But uh, you know, I am the indoor person. Like, we want to go flowers, we want to plant things, we're gonna take care of the chickens. You know, we'll do that with mommy, but we want to build things, we want to go for bike rides, we want to go for hikes, you know. Daddy is better at that. Sure, yeah. So now we'll have this is fun.

SPEAKER_00 21:53

Yeah, well, that's hopeful to hear, to know that I'm we can look forward to that. But yes, I think encouraging. For all the dads listening, make your special stuff with your kids, you know, the special activities just you do. As I kind of alluded to, when my husband does bedtime with my daughter, they just have special routines. And when my daughter has asked me to do some of those, I said no. It's like that's something you get to do with daddy. Like you do silly bedtime with daddy, or you reverse the order of some of these things with dad. And really honoring the special relationship dads get to build with their children, that's gonna be different than how mom relates to the children.

SPEAKER_01 22:32

Yes. And then us being the moms, like we can encourage that. And that's set the boundaries. Yeah. And no, this is, you know, we kind of usher them into that era where this is your special thing, create that special thing. And we can reach that along as well. I yeah, my husband has special songs with the kids when they put them to bed. I have my song. We don't sing the same song. I'm like, nope, right? That's theirs. And I think that takes a family together, creating that special moments and routines.

SPEAKER_00 23:02

Yeah, agreed.

SPEAKER_01 23:04

Yeah. Now kind of want to talk about something tangible. There's a goodbye, whether it's the preschool drop-off, you know, or is mommy leaving, or maybe both parents going on a date night, which I recommend everybody do. Yeah. Every couple, please go on date nights and hire a sitter and have your or have someone watch the children. That's good for the family. Like, what are some of the important steps? Whether it's two days before, one day before the day off, what are some of the important steps that they should have to help them through that arc of separation? Yeah. And as they return in the next day.

SPEAKER_00 23:49

Yeah, yeah. I think in the actual goodbye, short and sweet. So dropping them off for daycare or the babysitter came over, don't do this prolonged, you know, you're like reacting to them, getting sad. So you just keep reassuring, keep reassuring. To them, this actually registers as like, oh, this threat is actually real. Mom's really concerned. She's worried too. If you are confident, short, and sweet, and you're you're self-regulated, you know, you're not crying at the goodbye, that will help. And having a little ritual. So in the book, one example is they like make a heart with their hands or just a simple hug, kiss on the cheek. Um, I've seen parents, they draw a little heart on like their child's hand and pen or something, a sticky note in the lunchbox, like a little ritual you do that again is short and sweet. It's kind of the same idea of bedtime, of just having a routine helps prep their body for what is coming up. And in the longer run, talking about the goodbyes, so preparing them, of course, if you're dropping them off at kindergarten or a new daycare or babysitter, don't surprise them as if that will help make this less painful. I would talk about it days in advance, even maybe weeks in advance. Tell them what's going to happen. Be clear. Kids can handle a lot, and it doesn't do them a service to actually just spring it on them.

SPEAKER_01 25:25

This is so interesting. I'm always an advocate of prepping them. You know, I feel like how I've run my house in the past decade is it's a constant sneak preview of whatever is coming.

SPEAKER_00 25:35

Agreed. Same.

SPEAKER_01 25:36

However, I have hurt parents, and this is where, like, I don't want to overstep. And again, I'm not I'm not a psychologist, but this is just my hunch, and I would love for you to talk about it. Is that when the parents say that, but my kid will just keep on repeating it and having anxiety and not and they don't sleep, and so we don't talk about it. We don't talk about it until we absolutely have to. When there is such a big contraction, how do you guide them through that?

SPEAKER_00 26:06

Yeah, that's a great point. And I think you know, every parent knows their child the best. So and even I'm sure the children vary based on which child. Like my oldest needs a lot of prep. So knowing your child, maybe some of them would benefit from knowing weeks in advance. One would just benefit from knowing the day before, or even just the morning of. I think if there's that really big reaction, that's worth uh talking about uh head on, you know. Wow, you're really sad I'm gonna be leaving. I will come back. Or that's the opportunity to make more rituals to talk through how you could make this easier for them. And I would encourage a stance from the parents of just again being calm, not getting dysregulated with them, but showing that I've got this, you've got this, it will be a separation and it's gonna be okay.

SPEAKER_01 27:06

Peace is huge. Yeah. And at the same time, I know a lot of parents, myself included, gets dysregulated when my child is repeating the same thing that is not pleased over and over again. And then a lot of times we immediately think, oh my god, my kid is traumatized, my kids are so anxious. But I think a lot of times it's just also the way that they process, they're processing.

SPEAKER_00 27:29

Greed. You know, it's funny. As a therapist, one of the things I learned is if a client keeps bringing up the same thing over and over again, one, it's just their process, it takes time. But two, I probably am not fully getting what they're saying. So can I reflect it in a different way? Can we process a slightly different angle of it? I think with young kids, honestly, part of it is just their brain processing. They just need that repetition. But maybe being like, okay, I see you're still really sad. Should we draw a picture of what feeling sad feels like? Should we be an animal? And what does your body feel? What is it doing as it's sad? So using, you know, movement, color, uh, other activities that could help them process a different facet of what they're feeling.

SPEAKER_01 28:27

Those are good ideas out of it. You know, we express emotions through so many different ways. And yeah, oftentimes it's especially for young children, it's not speech. We know that much. Right.

unknown 28:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 28:43

So what do you say to the parents whose child cries every single time, big emotions all the time? Well, like those are the parents, oftentimes, who basically just end up not going to go, like they're just not gonna go out anymore. It's just so hard. At some point, they just give up. What do they do?

SPEAKER_00 29:02

Yeah, I would say, again, uh, there's the caveat that every parent knows their child the best. So if the child is truly inconsolable the entire time, multiple times, there might be something going on there. You know, I'd be considering like, how is the parent-child bond? What's the goodbye like, or even like the caregiver situation while the parents are gone? Does that feel unsafe for the child? So, first, just kind of checking in of is my child safe? You know, I'm doing a generally good job prepping them. Then I would just be consistent. You know, like for many parents, when you start dropping them off at daycare or maybe kindergarten, it's often you're gonna get big reactions for even weeks on end, and then they will adjust because their body starts to remember, mom does come back. I do get picked up after nap time or after lunchtime. And also check in with the teacher or the caregiver. Like how quickly do they recover? Because again, often we're just seeing the giant meltdown, and one minute later they have calmed down and recovered.

SPEAKER_01 30:11

Yeah. What you were saying reminded me too, and I think sometimes, especially for first-time parents, is jarring, is that the behavior of the children, a drop-off, for instance, or leaving, at one point it was fine, and all of a sudden it's not fine. You haven't cried for the past three months, and all of a sudden it's weak, like you have this huge reaction about me leaving or something like that. And I think this is just like a good reminder that as the children's brain grow, the capacity for process things increases, and some things that probably didn't bother them before all of a sudden bother them now because now they understand what that means. Yep, yep. Yeah, and this is just part of growing up, like it's just gotta be there and validate and hold space and and allow the their brain to process and to say, Oh, okay, I think I got this piece.

SPEAKER_00 31:09

That is such a good point. I I vividly have this experience with my daughter, where, like, for instance, when she was younger, she could ride certain rides at Disneyland, seem to love them. And then suddenly she was terrified. And I'm like, this seems like a regression. What's going on? No, it's just that she was actually more aware. So the sudden loud noise, this like dark witch coming out, was more scary for her. You know, her imagination had increased. So I think also being consistent that there are times it will seem like a regression, but it could actually be for your child a mental leap. It's actually progress.

SPEAKER_01 31:52

I think that's just like such a good reminder for all the parents out there. Yeah, as they grow, at the capacity grows, their end, the input increases and everything, and there's more to process, and then just like all of a sudden there's more colors. That's amazing. Yeah. So I think to sum up our conversation today, this talk today, which has been so good. If you want, if like the parents out there listening, if you want them to take one thing away from our conversation, what would it be? What is like the one thing that you want to really have them brand in their branded in their head as they go forward and navigate this, these like sadness, separation feelings?

SPEAKER_00 32:32

I would say your child being sad that you're leaving is not evidence you're doing something wrong. It is normal and it's a sign your child loves you, that they're actually attached to you, that they feel a normal distress at this kind of separation or break. So if you're a parent listening to this podcast, you're already probably doing a good job. You're looking for resources, you're reflecting on your parenting. It's normal and okay for them to have sadness when you are leaving them.

SPEAKER_01 33:11

That's beautiful. I think, yeah. It's like that that's an evidence of that secure detach attachment. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, with when the attachment is being removed that they're sad about, like it's it's a sign it's there.

SPEAKER_00 33:26

You were triggering the attachment system that's actually been developed. That is beautiful.

SPEAKER_01 33:31

So tell us like where people can find you. Oh, yeah. Or maybe there's is there something else coming up at the mindful peach? Like, share, share with our audience your work. Yes. How to work with you and all the fun stuff.

SPEAKER_00 33:43

Thank you. You can always just google our brand, The Mindful Peach. Our website is mindfulpeach.co.com. No M at the end. Um, we're also on Instagram, and we are currently finalizing our fourth book, which is on disgust, and then we'll be putting in an order for the physical books soon. So those will be coming in the next couple months. Yeah. And in the meantime, we're hoping to get more like educational materials out on social media and on our website. So if you want more general parenting and emotional resources, Google us, look us up.

SPEAKER_01 34:25

Yeah, and I just realized something that I love too in the back of the book. If anybody is interested, um, there is an adult resource book with a QR code, which is beautiful. So this is not just a children's book, but actually gives you legitimate and actionable parenting advice for the specific situations that you can implement in your home. Now, one question that I am like this is more for me. I'm curious. Yeah. Why mindful peach?

SPEAKER_00 34:55

Where did the name come from? Well, at the time we did the first book and we're building the brand, my daughter's favorite fruit was the peach. Loved it. And then peach or like momo is a very Asian fruit, I feel like, or one that Asians really enjoy. Yes. Um, and the mindful part just referencing like self-awareness, mindfulness.

SPEAKER_01 35:17

Yeah. I love a peach. Well, thank you so very much for today. And uh, yeah, I can't wait for the fourth book. Hopefully, we'll get a reading on that too and talk about it, what it looks like. Love that. Thank you for having me. Thank you, Dr. Anna. Yeah. And that concludes this week's Beyond the Story. I hope there are nuggets in there that you can use and your own home for all the beautiful parents out there. If anything, you're doing a great job when the kids are sad that you're leaving. It is actually a good thing, however, counterintuitive that is. I know it is for me and it is hard, but it's a good thing. And it's a good thing for you to want to take care of yourself so you can show up for your children and for your family. And we will all survive it. So, sending you all so much love. Take care of those hearts. And if you liked what you heard, please leave us a review, recommend it to your family and friends, and all the new moms and dads out there who are navigating similar things. I love nothing more than getting this information out there so everybody can be the happiest and the best and the most fulfilled parents they are. This world deserves that. So take good care and I will see you soon. Thank you so much for spending this time with us on Beyond the Stories. If this conversation was helpful, we'd love for you to share with a friend, a fellow parent, or anyone who might benefit from it. And if you feel moved to, please leave us a five-star review wherever you get your podcast. It truly helps more people find these conversations. You can also find more stories and resources by downloading the Gucci app in Apple App Store. All the links and resources, as well as ways to connect with us, are in the podcast description. And if you have any questions, episode requests, or topics you'll love us to explore, would truly love to hear from you. Thank you so much again for listening, and we will see you next time.